TriplePerspective's Greatest Fans

Whoa, I never knew my greatest fan...was...ASIAN. Strange

hahahahahaha a BLONDE. figures.

Woah my amazing fan is so handsome! Who would have guessed?

My greatest RED fan is....short? What a coincidence...I might actually like him!

Just shavin with his friends. With a BLUE razor...ok thats goin a bit far,

OK. I am seriously digging that umbrella.

I also like how they have pictures of the King of the Universe on their walls. Makes them that much cooler.

Hey-- I have that shirt!

Woah that's some seriously epic bling. And he looks so...contemplative...he's probably seeking the secret to my awesomeness...

What a brave RED fan, defending himself from the horrors of the BLUE fan

Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha

BLACK hair vs BLONDE hair... RED vs. BLUE. So intense.

k I don't know where these people come from, but they are seriously cool.

I know right? I wonder if theyll send us money...

WOW

We must have this clock.

This needs to be our profile pic...

The RED hand is longer than the BLUE hand...hmmm

Signed,

Pelo Rubio,

Pelo Negro

Pelo Castaño

Approximately 9000 Ways to Die in Physics

When life ISN'T so good...we at TriplePerspective know just how to make it worse.

Try...

1. Suffocating in a vacuum.

2. Getting your face sucked off by a black hole.

3. The Ishan frame of reference.

4. Jumping off an asteroid.

5. Getting dropped in a cave by seniors.

6. Getting run over by a Bugatti Veyron.

7. Having a tug of war with Arnold Schwarzenegger.

8. Being forced to work for a crazy Egyptian Pharaoh who wants you to inefficiently pull blocks at an angle.

9. Flying off on a tangent.

10. Watching the History channel. (How the Big Bang can kill YOU)

11. Wandering lonely as a cloud.

12. When the only purpose of your life is to serve as an example to others.

13. Asking 3 or more questions when Tyler is in the room.

14. Mass suicide related to a miscalculated periods of orbit.

15. Bending over and ripping your pants in front of a class of students.

16. Being sent to deep space for the period of orbit of a Milky Way bar.

17. Completely inelastic collisions (with seniors)

18. Pointing vectors the opposite way (180% WRONG).

19. FΔt (when your Δ t is as small as RED).

20. Gravitons (IMA FIRIN' 'EM).

21. When your static friction becomes kinetic.

22. Aliens compress the sun into a black hole.

23. Misapplication of Murphy's law.

24. Incorrect use of sig figs.

25. Aristotle. (Thinking you need a force to move...)

26. When Eo≠Ef (Nooooooooooooo!)

27. Germans. BAD.

28. Seven Degrees (Guess just how much worse it will be than SIX degrees...)

29. Spagettification.

30. Galactic Cannibalism.

31. Doing the "chain of pain" with 30 Japanese girls (900 times the pain--it's a thing of beauty...)

32. 1/1000 of an ampere....through the heart.

33. Faking electrocution videos.

9000. The Saxby Eyebrows.

Well, we did say "approximately"...

Signed,

Fn

Fp

Fg

The Epic TriplePerspective Award Ceremony of 2009-2010

Welcome, one and all...whether you be wonderfully avid followers of TriplePerspective, people who clicked "follow" but don't actually read this blog, lame people who read but dont follow, or absolute failures who don't read it at all (actually, if you don't read this, then you're not invited. go away. NOW. we don't love you. bye bye)...

Now, please welcome our hosts, RED, GREEN, and BLUE with a warm round of applause!

*Applause*

Thanks muchly!!! Quiet down now...or nowwww... now's fine too. SHUT UP. Thank you.

You lucky people are here today to witness a monumental occasion, a ceremony to end all ceremonies (except perhaps the one next year... now THERE's an event)...

Are you ready to behold the greatest event of all time? Are you ready to witness the most entertaining, outrageous, and funny award ceremony ever? Are you? ARE YOU? NAH, probably not. But here it is anyway.

GASP! ima so excited. Lets get started...


Geez guys. You might want to stop building up soo much excitement for the audience---wouldn't want to let them down if this ends up failing and being really lame. JUST KIDDING PEOPLE. THIS WILL NOT BE LAME. THIS WILL BE AMAZING. SO SHUT UP. START LAUGHING. AND KEEP READING...

I, RED, am proud to announce the first award.

I present to you, the "TEACHER I'VE HAD FOR 11 SEMESTERS AND THERE'S ONLY ONE MORE TO GOOOO Award"
Candidates this year are:
Jensen
Kim Jensen
Kimm Jensen
and last but not least,Kimberly Jensen

...And the award goes to... WOW...Never before in all of TriplePerspective history has this happened... All four have won!

*applause*

The next award is...the much anticipated Worst King of the Universe Award!

And for his assassination of Gandhi and his general carelessness towards the well-being of the human race, this award goes to the one, the immortal, the

ISHAN RANADE!!!

*wild boos and hisses*

Now, it is my privelege to present a very broad, very coveted award, applicable to a great many people. However, we believe that this person has what it takes. Now, without further ado... the winner of the "Best Romanian Math Teacher" Award is....

MRS ILAC!!!

*huge cheers interspersed with dramatic renditions of the quadratic formula song*

Every year, thousands upon thousands of obscure blogs appear on the internet. Not many are nearly as epic as ours. So, today, I present to you the "Best Blog in the Entire World Belonging to a Weird Obsessive, Korean Girl" ...

This Award goes to...

Tomberries.blogspot.com!!!

*applause, but not as big as the applause that TriplePerspective will get*

Presenting...the "massively" desirable MOST ATTRACTIVE award!! Which can only go to the one, the only...

Mr. Peter Saxby!

*wild and slightly embarassed applause as Mr Saxby stands up to claim his prize and promptly rips his pants*

This next award could only be given to one person. Actually, we felt it was kind of self explanatory (unlike our other awards...) Still, the "Most Stoic" award goes to...

JOSH YE!!!

*VERY SERIOUS CLAPPING.*

Someone this year has mad YOU face palm on multiple occasions. He's made you shake your head in disgust while letting out a half-chuckle. And with that, I present to you the "Punniest" Award. He will be speaking to you, the audience, tonight in a sad but respectable attempt to elicit laughter. The "Punniest" Award goes to:

ISAAC "PUNLORD" STINSON!!!

*Scattered applause and groaning as the self-titled "Punlord" himself takes the stage to give an acceptance speech...*

Thank you! Thank you. You look great tonight! but not really, i just say that to make you like me and keeping wanting to hear my puns. So stay beautiful.

Its funny, the other day, I ran into this urban lawn ornament playing the drums...so i asked him, what are you, some kind of metrognome? hahaha! but seriously folks, it sure is an honor to recieve this award. hey. is the spotlight hon-or off? hahaha. I had this tape that I was watching, and it was of my dog. boy did she whine a lot. but she was so good at it that i had to watch it again. but first, i had to rewhined it! hahaha. Anyways (Editor's note: "Anyways" is not grammatically correct. One should instead say "anyway," or if they want to sound sophisticated, they should say "Whatever the case may be." Continuing...), I was at a dj club the other night and they suddenly switched from my favorite song genre, electronic, to country. I said to the DJ "Oh techno you didnt!" hahaha. did you hear about the new internet mattress? it provides internet connection while you sleep. Only available at sleep-country, USA, "Wi-fi a Mattress Anywhere else!" Hmm.. Im gonna need some fruit as soon as I'm done here, probably speaches and cream...and, judging by the pained expressions on your faces, it's time for me to leave! Thank you, and goodnight!

*More groans and scattered laughter as people finally get the jokes*

For commendable soliciting, I am proud to present the "BEST TELEMARKETER" award to...

BROWN!!!

*huge cheers from the Indian section of the crowd, and from anyone who bought his stuff...*

Next, the "Creepiest Yet Strangely Hilarious Dinosaur" Award goes to...

ARON DAW!!!

*Massive laughs as adoring fans attempt and fail at doing dinosaur impersonations*

There haven't been many great male companions this year. The one that we have chosen has proven to be the best, and most amazing male companion we've seen. The "Best Male Companion" award shall go to:

Lydia Hsu!

*slight confusion except for the few people who get it...*

That brings us to the well-deserved "Best Second Period Korea Documentary" Award, which goes to...

THE SECOND PERIOD KOREA DOCUMENTARY GROUP!!!

*massive applause with random shouts of "LONG LIVE KIM JONG IL!!!!"*

Now, there (sadly) hasn't been an enormously large number of commenters on this blog, but after all, we're about quality over quantity here at TriplePerspective. Regardless, we would like to present the "Best Comment" award to the following person for her strangely insightful but obviously wrong comment on the "A Day in the Life of a TriplePerspectiver" post:

"I like how you guys [Karl, Daniel, and Alexander] are the only commenters...its almost as if you have some "connection" to RED... BLUE, [and] GREEN..."

While it may not be true, its the best we have, so it is my honor to present the "Best Comment" Award to:

ARCHANA MANDAVA!!!

*lots of applause*

3v3ry y34r, we haVe an a55ortment of h4x0rs to d33l with h3r3 4t TriplePerspect1v3. But n0n3 hav3 h4x3d with as much ski11 a5 t3h person w3 w1ll pr35eNt to y0u 4 t3h "H4x0r 0f t3h y33r"
/\w42d...

4nd t3h 4w4rd go3z 2

3LU3!!!

*Roars of applause and cheering*

While lacking in primaryness, this blogger's contributions were significantish. Of all the many shades and colors that aren't red, blue, or yellow, this color alone stands out in its rise to glory as a member of TriplePerspective. Therefore the honor of "Best Non-Primary Blogger" goes to...

GREEN!

*Lots and Lots and Lots and Lots of applause*

Now while this blogger might be so small I often have trouble noticing him, his contributions have been big. Or at least equal. Whatever the case may be, it is my personal honor to present the coveted "1/2" Award to my personal friend and fellow blogger...

...wait where did he go?

Oh, ok I found him. Without further ado, the award goes to...

RED!

*HUGE applause, but for a "short" amount of time*

Well that about wraps it up for tonight guys! Hope you enjoyed everything. If you didn't win something...you'll always have nex..OH. It seems that we've forgotten to present the most important award of the night!

Come on, come on, hurry up and give the award already... ima startin to get hungryyyy...human fleshhhhhh...heheheh

Since we all know what happens when BLUE gets too hungry... I think it might be time to present the final award together....

We, the faithful bloggers and founders of TriplePerspective present.................................

The "Totally and Absolutely Not-Biased-Whatsoever Award for the Most Amazing Blog in the History of the Universe!!!!"

Which (surprisingly) goes to...
.
..
...
....
.....
....
...
..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

.................
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
TRIPLEPERSPECTIVE.BLOGSPOT.COM !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*Gargantuan, behemoth, mammoth, gigantic, enormous, (umm...checking synonyms on word...) immense, vast, and colossal cheering and applause that goes on and on and on and on for eternity times 9001!!!

In conclusion,

*Bows*

*Exits*

*Blasts off on a jet pack* (is it good to be the one who types these things up or what?)

Announcing...

You... The viewers... Have been with us every step of the way. NOW, it's time to award those who are truly deserving...the truly dedicated...the truly AWESOME...

Presenting... the First Annual TriplePerspective Yearbook Awards, with your hosts: Myself, BLUE

The one, the amazing, the... GREEN,

And last but not tallest, the 1/2, the only...RED

Just to be clear, we DO NOT ACCEPT BRIBES OF ANY KIND.

...Only... "donations"...

The 2009-2010 Annual TriplePerspective Award Ceremony will take place officially on Saturday, May 29th. Expect regular sporadic posts from now until then.

Sincerely,

Royal RED
Benevolent BLUE
and GREEN the Great

16 Days...

...since our last post.

I'm too attractive for this...don't you agree?

You're the most attractive person I know! XD

Wait...RED? A-a-attractive?!? But he has so little mass, I barely even felt his gravitrons when I was standing right next to him!

My wavicles are just so much stronger than yours, deal with it.

Pew-pew!! ima firin' my gravitronzzz...

Now while RED may be un-noticable, at least he is not like his mom, who is so big you can feel her gravitational attraction from across the galaxy...

Ouch.

Looks like he JUST CAN'T TAKE IT.

lololol I bet he will have to "get" back at me on a certain day of the week coming up...

Whatever the case may be...life has been so boring since Dallas...y'all. ..it's been sixteen days.........sixteen dayssssss

What've we missed? There was...a dance. That no one went to...

...Not much missed there. Hey we also started Romeo (called Ro-emo by some for certain failish tendencies) and Juliet (who hasn't gotten any clever nicknames...yet).

Si! Pues, hoy es cinco de mayo. (lo siento a todas las personas de frances o japones), porque nosotros comemos MUCHA COMIDA, por ejemple, pasteles, tortillas, y cosas. Ah, yo recuerdo, AZUL y VERDE no estan en espanol dos, simplemente son UNOS, que embarazada.

*Thumbs nose*

Hey ROJO I understood what you said there. You can't keep anything from me...even if we are in the most fail spanish class ever. Thou shalt expire within the confines of a pit!

It wilt be doneth on thy favorite day of the week.

Resign not thy day gig, thou saucy, motley-minded knave.

Comedy does not suit thee well. Carry on!

Wherefore we go'est on? Ne'er a time better for departure is now.

Prithee, he is right. Get thee hence!

Sealed,

MontaBLUE,
REDulet,
and GREENvolio

[They exit]

Error Code: 404

AAHH what is happening? error? Error? ERROR?

The events of recent days have been a mistake (or an error) on behalf of TriplePerspective. In fact, due to the flood of calls which followed our new blogger's brief appearance on the blog, and to the certain exploits of a certain hacker, the Editor-in-chief here at TriplePerspective has made a decision. You will all be happy to know that the blogger known as BROWN will no longer be posting on this site.

But...I got cheap stuff!

Furthermore...

...ima back!

Signed,

1001001011001010101111010110101001101010011010101011...
101101011101001010110110110110100110110110101010101010111010...
100101110101010110110110110101011010101011011011011011011010101001001001001010101001101010101010101010101111010101010101110102

Ima H4x0r

Well.

I was kinda b& from Tripleperspective. And REPLACED. By BROWN (haha VERRRYY clever...lolz). Who is NOT FUNNY.

Luckily, i can still edit t3h blog. Mwahahaha

So now i've become H4x0r!!! Haha this is so exciting i am so 1337

BTW, 425-869-589343875834 is NOT BROWN's number.

Signed,

81u3

A Day in the Life of a Triple Perspectiver

GREEN has joined the chat

BLUE has joined the chat

RED has joined the chat

RED: Okay guys, I think we should post today.
BLUE: I dun wannnaaaa
ima tireeeedddd...
Ima go to sleep
GREEN: ..us....post? NAH.
RED: GEEZ GREEN, you're taking my line! Remember? I'm supposed to be the main character in the post today, gosh.
GREEN: wait, but, umm... ok. Weren't we gonna do a chat-style post?
BLUE: Main character? RED? BWAHAHAHAHAHAH
RED: Yeah, BLUE, I'm in the spotlight today. And GREEN, hurry up and come up with something clever! We're not paying you for nothing!!
GREEN: actually, you're just paying me nothing. Anyway, wasn't this blog MY idea in the first place? And since when do we have main characters on MY blog?
BLUE: Sigh, this is taking too long. Why did I ever agree to this blog in the first place?? Haha, but we've had some good timezz. What's ur fav post so far?
RED: The one that you're supposed to be writing, right now, BLUE. Now give me the pearls!
BLUE: NOOOOO my pearlsss! haven't u done enough?? i can't bear watching u give them to...*cry*... just remember...O-LAN IS THE LAND...
RED: No, no no. That's not funny. Take it from the top. GREEN, it's your turn
GREEN: Ok, ok. First post: "Hi Peoples?" ...i think thats a pretty good start.
RED: I think so
Hm.... what would be funny to our oh- so- loving viewers?
GREEN: uhhh make a joke or something. you're supposed to be funny
BLUE: I don't wanna post tonight!!! sighh...
RED: Our post will be: GEEZ, NAH, and GASP
isn't that funny?
BLUE: No.
GREEN: hmmmmmmmm NAH.
RED: *cry*
BLUE: *LAUGH*
I have no heart.
Mwahahaha...
GREEN: ummmm BLUE are you okay?
RED: And this is why our posts are all terrible
We should replace BLUE
don't you think, GREEN?
GREEN: With ORANGE mebbe...
RED: Sounds like a plan
BLUE: ha. Haha. HAHA. HAHAHAHAHA
HUMAN FLESHHHHHH
YUMYUMYUMYUMyummy
RED: Case in point.
BLUE: IMA EAT UUU. RAWRRRRR
GREEN: k go and say something for the followers now, RED
Preferably before BLUE eats us.
BLUE: BWAHAHAHAHA
RED: We should pretend we killed BLUE.
BLUE: IMA ZOMBIEVAMPIRENINJAPIRATE
U CANT KILL ME
RED: Nobody likes you, or your posts
GREEN: Just say something quickly!
BLUE: HEHEHEHEHEHEEEEEeeeeee...
heeehe...
...
...
ima...ima...im ok now... i think
*cough*
GREEN: Our avid readers are riveted to their seats, waiting...
FOR SOMEONE TO SAY SOMETHING.
RED: Sorry guys, didn't you get the memo? The boss says there's not enough followers on the blog, and our revenue for this quarter is down 30 percent. They're gonna have to shut TriplePerspective down.
BLUE: hey, IDEA! I should post piece's of the day on our blog! Today's is: American in Paris by Gershwin! Part I: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BUfI6v6SwL4
GREEN: nice piece, bad timing
RED: yeah BLUE, we're gonna have to let you go in order to keep up with our costs
GREEN: I will inform our readers.
BLUE: Awwww... i bet our readers will miss me...

BLUE is offline.
Messages you send will be delivered when BLUE comes online.

GREEN: OK PEOPLE! (is this thing on? alright good.) DUE TO MANAGEMENT ISSUES AND POSSIBLE CANNIBALISM, BLUE IS NOT GOING TO BE WITH US FOR AN INDEFINITE PERIOD OF TIME.
RED: So, GREEN. I think we should consider outsourcing our bloggers. An Indian, "BROWN" maybe? will be alot cheaper for us.
GREEN: Great idea.
RED: INSTEAD, WE ARE REPLACING HIM WITH ANOTHER, JUST AS FUNNY, (a little cheaper) AND SLIGHTLY LESS ANNOYING, *BROWN*
*applause*
GREEN: *applause*

BROWN has joined the chat.

GREEN: BROWN, you're on TriplePerspective! How do you feel about this momentous occasion?
RED: So, with the addition of BROWN, it'll be the "Blog of 1 1/2 people" now, right?
GREEN: is he not a person?
RED: I guess not.
GREEN: (this is the part where you type something)
BROWN: hello
how u do?
i am feeling very welcome
do u hav any curry and roti?
GREEN: isn't he great folks?
lets give him a round of applause (in the comments plz)
BROWN: thank you very much
call me
my number is...
425 - 869 - 589343875834
GREEN: RED, lets finish this off quick before he tries to sell them something
BROWN: would u like to buy some PAAANT?
GREEN: ummm ok...

Signed,

RED: kay BROWN, this is the part when we say something clever
Watch and learn
*SIGNED, NAH*
lolz, isn't that clever?
GREEN: something like that.
BROWN: very clever yes, very clever
VERRY clever
GREEN: ...AND GREEN. Peace.
RED: Okay, that's it. Cut the scene
BROWN: ill give u a great deal
if--

RED is offline
Messages you send will be delivered when RED comes online.

GREEN is offline
Messages you send will be delivered when GREEN comes online.

-----------10 minutes------
BROWN is offline. Messages you send will be delivered when BROWN comes online.

Seven Days...

We at Tripleperspective love us some horror movies...

Well, we love making inside jokes from them anyway...

Well Clarice.... have the lambs stopped screaming?

Mwahaha check your corners, check the ceiling!

...and really watch out for Cuban food.

A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti.

Silence of the Lambs, if you didn't knowwww... we also saw the Ring!! I didn't know horses could be that scary...

...or ferry engines.

OR FLIES.

Dwayne Barry NEVER LIES.

and the shower continues to run.

DUN DUN DUN DUNNN DUN DUN DUN DUNNN. KIM JONG IL!

my arm...and this post...are complete...

I hope we put enough classic horror film references (Psycho, X-Files, Korea Documentary [my personal favorite horror film], The Ring, Sweeney Todd, The Silence of the Lambs) for everybody!

The above has been the last words of...

BLUE Barry,

AlfRED Hitchcock,

and GREENey Todd

Spreeng Braek

...has gotten to some of our heads, obviously.

I has not gonn tto skool en 5 DAYZ!!@!~ I has forgotten howz to spel.

As a wise friend once said: The lolcatz friend LOL i only just discovered this unique breed recently; they lurk about in my uni acting only s little worse than the Wapanese type. Lol these are the type of people who TyPe n torkZ liek zis, Coz, deY hAz da Dumbs an Dey orWaiz has a Kookeezz and r ninjarz. Oh my god I'm so sick of them, especially when it comes to having a civilized conversation regarding an upcoming assignment. I just want to cry...

i dOn'T knoW hoo ur tolkin boUtt RED...(ps i am pretty ninjar)

Anyway...we're doin' another post to make up for lost dayzzz. What have YOU been doing for Spreeng Braek? I have been vewwy vewwy busy. Kindasometimesish. And sleep is guuuuuuuuuud. And essaywriting is baddddddd. And I wonder if we can turn in "A Nightmare on Mango Street" for extra credit XD.

I've been sniffly, sneezy, and COFFEE :(.

I never knew coffee was an adjective. Whatever the case may be, however much we forget our spelling and our grammar, we will never forget you, dear readers. We love you all with a burning passion like a million fiery suns and stuff, so I'd just like to take this moment to say... HAPPY APRIL FOOLS DAY PEOPLE!

Signed,

BLUE,
RED,
and GREEN